Power Rankings - Flying Cossacks Edition
Our friend and league-mate Ihor of the Flying Cossacks was kind enough to write up a power rankings. I only edited his Canadian "offence" out a few times, hope you get a kick out of them as I did.

 

20.  Three peat in the making (2-2, 649.2)
The defending champ isn’t very good, and I’m not just talking about this year's team. He isn’t very good, his drafting and managing rate among the worst. Other than Holt, Westbrook, and Shockey, the remaining players may have just been taken from free agency and you wouldn’t know it. He won the last 2 years' championships with average teams, kind of like the way your secretary at work lucks out in a fantasy pool. It just goes to show you fantasy football is more about the luck of your schedule than how well your team does.

19.  Gotham Tanks (0-4, 565.2)
He avoids last place in the rankings only because our secretary chump got an honorary appointment. He needs to grow some balls and drop some mediocre players on bye weeks or is this another secretary ran team? If so, please accept my apology. But there is hope in Gotham, the Giants metamorphed into a good football team last week, making their D and HC valuable again.

18. Emerald City Sure Shot (1-3, 611.7)
His offense is solid, and LT will get it going soon . Saints HC should have been waived after week one - both their lines would get pushed off the ball by William & Mary, but they get a temporary reprieve against Hofstra this weekend. Still, it won’t be enough, the defense is pretty sorry, and defense is what carries you in this scoring system. Never in the history of fantasy football has a commish been the victim of his own scoring system so many times in so few years.

17.  Braswell's Bunch (1-3, 633.8)
Reggie Bush should be a stud now with Deuce out. Having 2 solid QBs also helps in this scoring system but that’s where the good news ends. The Panthers HC should be in FA for the rest of the year, the team doesn’t even have a sack this year.

16.  New England 4out7 (2-2, 720.6)
Brady is a stud, and Pennington helps too but like all the teams in the bottom 5, the D really sucks ass. Will Witherspoon is his only healthy D player over 10.0, and it’s not by much.

15. The Mad Ralphers (1-3, 735.2)
This team is pretty solid all round, and I’m not just saying that because his logo has the greatest Luchadore of all time. Not much to separate this team from say #7.

14.  Legends Club (1-3, 742)
Delhomme and Rudi Johnson are his two best offensive players and they are both out. Those injuries and few good defensive options will keep this team in mediocrity. Selvin Young could be a nice dark horse this week, with the Travis Henry injury. Picking up Dan Morgan is an interesting move; since he isn’t gonna play, not that it will make a difference. The claws of the Cossacks bear will open him up like a bag of chips.

13.  The Beaglets (1-3, 752.7)
Like all the teams from #7-15, a fairly solid group assembled here. He’s going without a HC this weekend even though the favored Cardinals and Redskins are in free agency. Maurice Jones Drew has been a bust and I don’t see that changing much, he couldn’t even get it going against the league worst Denver run defense. Devin Hester has only caught one pass but is the #7 ranked WR. Just goes to show you that the best draft strategy would have been to draft QBs first, then top LB/DB, then get RB/WR later that return kicks.

12.  The Untouchables (2-2, 756.1)
Has probably the most underrated QB tandem in Green and Harrington. Lamont Jordan has been even better, but will that continue with Rhodes in the mix? Maroney and Bruce are battered and Falcons D/ST and Chiefs HC are both strange plays this weekend since there are better options in free agency. Or maybe it makes perfect sense, a below average team has a below average manager that makes below average moves.

11.  Team Golbeck (3-1, 763.3)
3-1 and ranked #11, you might think that’s silly. Well this is the Power Rankings, not the luck rankings. I don’t really care how many wins you or the Mary Poppins answering the phone have. Marlin Jackson is the #1 DB, it’s not often you have a CB that doesn’t return kicks as #1, but I guess teams are passing a lot to catch up to the Colts. Golbeck's RB/WRs pretty much suck, not that it matters in this league. Palmer and Favre have done all the damage. Picking a good HC every week could get him into the playoffs.

10.  Pepsi Platoon (1-3, 776.2)
The jury is still out on Jamal Lewis; he hasn’t done much other than that one big week against the Bungles. I’d sooner use a platoon at HC than plug and play Lions there. This team won’t make the playoffs for two reasons: Coke is better than Pepsi and 1 manager is better than 2.

9.  Snoqual Scoring Machine (3-1, 812)
The Kitna experiment is going well and the Jedi Addai keeps on trucking. Bulger, the only other recognizable name on offense, is on a 2-week company-imposed holiday. Bulluck, DJ Williams and Napoleon Harris form the core of a very solid defense that should continue to give him a chance to win every week

8. Fort Lauderdale Ballers (1-3, 815.9)
Manning, Cutler, and a very good defense will give him a chance to make the playoffs but will he have the balls to drop the Broncos D and Ravens HC and go to platoons before its too late… both will disappoint.

7.  Uptown Anarchist (2-2, 912.6)
Romo has single-handedly vaulted this team into an area of FP in which it should be. Gates, Ocho, Packers HC have also made solid contributions. The rest of the team, however, has contributed like a barber exercising his democratic right to vote on which fish should be freed in the Atlantic.

6.  Strange Brew (3-1, 866.2)
Strange Brew was funny when I was in high school, but now it’s just a poor man's Dumb and Dumber. Jeff Garcia is one of the top NFL quarterbacks, even if he isn’t fantasy wise. Ronnie Brown will crash land once he stops orbiting the league's worst defenses. Cowboys HC is kicking ass and the defense is ok… but is it ok enough?

5.  Seattle C-Hawk FC (3-1, 911.3)
I’m not sure if this is a soccer or football team, but it is a cheeky name. He saved his best score of the season for me, and that’s pretty much what you need to beat the Cossacks. Brees won’t be the stud many expected, but he should be a star this week against the passrushless Panthers. The C-Hawk D is solid but not great. His success has been coming from Crayton, Housh and Witten. The Steelers D and Seahawks HC have also been good.

4.  Dirty Surgical Procedure (3-1, 915.7)
A unique team name and logo. I like it. It is also symbolic of how he dissected the league's scoring system, his D is top rate, and his offense has plenty of bite too. His HC (Colts) and D/ST (Ravens) were smart, even if the Ravens will disappoint. About the only thing he missed, and this is rather big, is the value of top QBs over top RBs. The lack of a top QB will cost him a shot at the title.

3.  Angry Hippies (3-1, 930.7)
Has the two best LBs in DeMeco Ryans and London Fletcher. His D is littered with other studs too. His backup DEs won’t continue at this pace, and his offense is very pedestrian. The Titans HC will win a lot of games this year. Starting the Lions D is like jaywalking the highway at rush hour, but the Angry Hippies need to represent in some way. Still, 2 QBs and a great D is the winning formula.

2.  Flying Cossacks (3-1, 961.2)
An auto-drafted Donovan McNabb might have felled a lesser man, but not a white man from Canada. We have thick skin up here, at least those of us that have been out of the city. I have one-and-a-half QBs and my D is first rate, what more do I need to say? Oh, and I have the Patriots HC too.

1.  Twisted Transistors (4-0, 1048.4)
Another cool team name and the only undefeated team left, and deservedly so. He has Barret Ruud and Randy Moss. Owens and Bucs HC are making him proud too. And now he has a 2nd QB in Griese. He’s stocked at every position; the highly charged Transistors are the only team that has a current running from top to bottom.